


Heraldic Eye Gougers

by MadMonarch



Category: The Last Herald-Mage (Valdemar), Valdemar Series - Mercedes Lackey
Genre: Gen, Is this crack?, Not Beta Read, Vanyel typical drama, but not really, eye gouging things
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-12
Updated: 2019-09-12
Packaged: 2020-10-14 23:22:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 697
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20609030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MadMonarch/pseuds/MadMonarch
Summary: Just some ridiculous Heralds of Valdemar stuff. I'd rate it G except for the fact I'm calling them eye gougers.





	Heraldic Eye Gougers

**Author's Note:**

> *15 year old awkwardly shuffles in and waves* Hi! Just a Heralds of Valdemar fan that got dragged into fandom by my parents. Now I just kinda lurk in fandom, but I wanted to share something I wrote. Rewrite of a fic I posted to Tumblr a year ago. First fic I've posted to ao3 and my second fic ever. (The first fic I don't speak of, because even though I logically know cringe culture is stupid, I still cringe whenever I think of that little kid modern Hamilton au with nerf guns and cookies.)

Herald Vanyel, and Gods wasn't that a change, had just been booted out of the Dean's office, and was now squinting his eyes at the light coming in through the window opposite the wizened oak door. To a random passerby, he might seem like a lanky, ungainly child playing dress up as a Herald that looked like he'd had candy shoved at him when he'd expected a scolding. That was, of course, completely true in every respect from his point of view. Earlier Savil had practically kicked down his door, thrown some whites in his face, and informed him the Dean wanted him after breakfast. Not something one tends to expect 3 candlemarks before dawn.

"_Would've thought they would wait a bit longer before sending you on your first solo assignment."_

_ "Would've thought you'd still be sleeping in and playing dead, you dramatic horse." _

A snort, followed by, _"Me? The dramatic one? Vanyel, this is why we can't have nice things. Also, Savil's coming."_

Speak of the devil, there was the harsh sound of her boots around the corner. Vanyel left scrambling to stand straight and try to be the adult he supposedly was now._"Little more warning next time Yfandes?! Do you live to see me suffer?!"_

_ "That **is** the foundation our relationship is based on."_

"So you got your first proper assignment." That wasn't a question, and that tone bode bad things for Vanyel. Her poised figure and carefully arched eyebrow were merely the icing on the cake. Savil had a terrifying ability to strike a disturbing mix of inadequacy and fear into whoever she chose, and currently it was all focused on Vanyel. Then she relaxed her posture and gestured for Vanyel to follow her. "Walk with me Vanyel."

Vanyel rushed to catch up with her, trying to force his legs to match her pace in something resembling gracefulness. This was the point in the conversation where things either went great or horrible.

"You can fight. You can cast magic. You can work with your Companion. You can read, figure, and pass judgement as a Herald. You understand the importance of Valdemar's needs versus your own. Not to mention you're a more independent and mature young man than when the whole mess started, as tragic as the circumstances that forced that maturity and independence were. You've formed a sense of self and confidence in your various roles and identities, though there's still some development that needs to be done. But before you stretch your wings and go off on your own for the last time, there is one last lesson I wish to impart."

Vanyel had no clue where his aunt was going with this. What could this mysterious lesson **be****?** But she had stopped talking. So they walked in silence. The only sound being the mostly in sync ***click* *clack* ** of their boots. Soon enough they were at Savil's suite of rooms.

"Wait," she ordered as she pushed him into a creaky chair. She seemed to be doing _something_ in the corner of the room, but he couldn't quite arch his neck to see what. Soon she came up with 2 identical sticks that had nubs on one end, and on the other end were frighteningly sharp. Sharp enough to gouge a man's eyes out. Thus he immediately named them the eye gougers. Now here is the thing, why did Savil have them, and why did he never see them in weapon's practice? He heard a distinctly familiar wicker from the back of his brain, thought whether it was actually Yfandes or his own imagination is for you to decide.

Savil marched over and dumped the eye gougers in his lap. "Let me get the rest."

_"__There's more?!?!" _Yfandes was definitely laughing at him now. Though what he was missing he was terrified to find out. Finally Savil came up again, this time hiding the object behind her back. Clearly consorting with the Companions.

"Vanyel, this critical skill I'm about to teach you has saved many a Herald from boredom, madness, and hypothermia." Then she threw a blue ball of yarn into his lap, and it finally clicked.

"YOU'RE TEACHING ME TO KNIT?!?!?!?!?!"


End file.
